quacklemore:

I’ll stop procrastinating tomorrow

msjewbooty:

what has four legs? a table! haha, i love to have fun

vaporeowned:

boy: Its like we finish each others sentences

girl: .

febricant:

SHIA LEBEOUF LIVE

THIS IS NOT A DRILL

  • Mako: It's an honor to meet you, sir.
  • Zuko: No please, the honor is mine.
  • Mako: Oh wow thank y-
  • Zuko: It's all mine. Every bit of it in the world. I own all of the honor. No touching.

realdwntomars:

Being able to find someone you click with so naturally is the best feeling ever. You feel like you’ve been best friends you’re whole life, it feels like you’re coming home. You’re so comfortable with them. Maybe that’s what a soulmate is. Not someone who shares every single thing in common with you, but someone who feels like home.

I hate when i’m trying to blow out birthday candles and little kids try to do it with me like excuse u but it’s not ur birthday so please take a step back

elysedc:

The ultimate dad joke compilation

roachpatrol:

helianthi:

What did the pirate say when he turned 80

Aye matey

fRICK

dapperalbinobudgie:

instagrarn:

goodnight moon. goodnight Milky Way. goodnight Ursa Major (UMa I dSph). goodnight 24IC 1613 (UGC 662.350[8].

goodnight nerd

damedonger:

accomplishment: making a cat sound at a cat and the cat makes a cat sound back

arcticmonkies:

*says i dont care* *actually does tho*

supernatural-tardis:

i had a crush on this guy and i decided to pull a Pavlov on him by offering him whenever i saw him  this brand of candy he seemed to really like and after a while whenever he saw me he got excited for a second then you could see his expression shift to wondering the why the hell was he so happy to see me and i swear it was the evilest thing but also the most hilarious i made a guy like me by conditioning him into associating me to a candy he liked

nonomella:

my 6-year-olds were upset because i taught them ‘television’ and they were like NO TEACHER IT’S A TV

so i wrote ‘television’ on the board and highlighted “T” and “V” and they reacted like i’d just taught them the secrets of the universe

©uk